Sunday, November 15, 2015

not clouds, ... but, it's Claudia, passing ...

yes, not the clouds, it was Claudia.

she passed away just last November 9. it was sad but it was bound to happen.  Time, just as it will do for all of us, had finally claimed her.  old age had made her sickly and feeble during the past weeks and no medicine could ever reverse the ravage of Time.

now as I write this, my mind floated back in remembrance of my last encounter with her.  it was on FaceTime.  there is really such great physical distance between us as she was in the US.  I called her name several times but it appeared the painkillers she had ingested had taken hold of her senses.

she never smiled back at me as she was wont to do.  that warm smile that she had not withheld from me ever since the very first day I stepped foot in their house to start my courtship with her youngest daughter.  I missed it so.  during that FaceTime moment, I never told my wife, but, my heart cried helplessly.  I could only offer a fervent prayer to the Infinite if it is possible to make her smile anew.

Claudia is my wife's mother and so she was my second mother in this physical plane.  there is no doubt in my heart that she had wholeheartedly accepted me like her own son.  as me and my wife hurdled the challenges of married life, she was always there with her words of wisdom, encouragement, comfort, and an all encompassing motherly love.  every occasion we visited, her warmth and goodness and support always shone through.

i will miss the homely baked goodies she loved to serve.  i will cherish in my heart that funny moment during my early courtship days, when, she learned i was vegetarian and she cooked for me a meal of chilli peppers in coconut milk.  i heartily ate those chilli pepper spears to impress her,  confident in my thought that they were the ones that are not hot.  but they were, and they burned inside my mouth, and my tongue, and my throat. tears had formed in the corners of my eyes, and beads of sweat appeared on my forehead.  and she was there, watching me, with that motherly smile, so innocent, unknowing that those chillis had wrought havoc in me.

Claudia, or, Nanay Luding, as we fondly call her, is like the white clouds i saw today up in the sky this radiant Sunday morning -- light, bright, easy, happy.

she had passed away physically, but she will remain in my heart. . .

so long, Mother ...

4 comments:

~bani said...

beautiful recount... i think the elements of sky have something that always stirs memories. May the expanse be with you and your mother. always.
Love and light

sito saguid said...

Dear bani

thanks for the visit. in our sojourn in this physical plane there are people we are bound to be connected with and they are the ones who bring Light, Love, and Life, especially during our bleak moments here.

Claude is.such one person for me.

Christopher Dos Santos said...

Namaste dearest brother Sito.

Parting of a matriarch visits upon the entire family, inconsolable sorrow. Minds reel, as they inevitably become adrift in chasms of immeasurable grief. Marked by the blessings of time, dear brother, the interminable pain engulfing your hearts will, inevitably, rise to the heavens upon wings of countless cherished memories. This cycle of despair and reunification, truly, is the nature of love.

Never can we prepare ourselves for tragic circumstance brother Sito. Yet, somehow, we are asked, each in our own way, to charge ourselves with the courage to try. May the loving arms of God engulf your extended family with the warmth and heartfelt solace surely required to mend this vast rip in the fabric of your lives.

Contemplating the void left by the passing of dearest Claudia, my tears presently wet the tapestry of our loving friendship brother. In this moment of mutual sorrow, I offer you, as well, your entire family, my deepest condolences.

In Lak' ech, brother Sito, transient is the spirit of love as it whispers in and out of this physical plane.

sito saguid said...

brother Chris

thank you very much for these comforting words. as you have mentioned, we are, each of us, not spared from sad circumstances but we have to live on and muster the courage to rise above the grief. i and all the members of our family will.

Nanay Luding will not be forgotten. she will continue to bless us with her presence deep in our hearts.

thanks much for your words of wisdom -- " transient is the spirit of love as it whispers in and out of this physical plane. "